Stop The Blaming: Hey, I know you can see things that your partner could improve. The longer you live with someone, the more you can see their potential – which is the flip side of saying “their shortcomings.” 

The question is, what do you do with this information?  

Do you tell them?  Does that work for you?  

Do you keep it a secret?  Is that working for you?

I want to share you a secret I have learned about couples who move in with each other or who marry. You will always partner up with someone who is just as defective as yourself.  For every problem you see that your partner has, you have one.  If you wonder about this, ask your partner about  your problems. 

And whose problems can you fix. Yours, of course.  Point your finger at your partner and it just puts off how long before they start working on their problems. Oh, and maybe it will put off you starting to work on yours.  

If you want to wait forever, just blame.  I've found it doesn't work.

I have seen thousands of couples and helping people make better marriages is a joy to me.  (Learn more about me and my wife, Sandra.)

You might start by going to my Main Page to get an idea of this website.  I've also created a page of One-Liners that have helped me and that I share.  You can get explanations for those ideas by clicking on them.  You might want to start with the page I created to guide people at this site.  You might want to jump right in to learning what is going on in marriages and what to do. Or perhaps you want a specific answer to a specific problem.  Try searching the site or look at my page on solving problems.

When in doubt, email me, Al Turtle.  I will try to direct you.

As a gift, I want you to get the marriage of your dreams and I believe that

“It takes one to make a marriage and two to make a divorce. ”

So go for it?

Al