If you have been following my work through Part One: Master/Slave and Part Two: Power of Passivity, then this may be your next stop. I decided to share my path down a bit deeper into the basement. Be warned! The steps down here may be tippy.
Continue reading →Recognizing MasterTalk, avoiding it, reframing it gets simpler.
Continue reading →Been thinking of this for some time. I keep finding that sometimes being Rebellious is the way to go. Sometimes Stubbornness is wonderful. Even sometimes Passivity is a jewel. But when? I've never shared my enthusiasm about rebelling and being stubborn, and I fear I have given passivity a "bad rap." Enjoy!
Continue reading →This is an excerpt from my paper on Dialogue in a Hierarchy. It focuses on decision making. It now includes a chart.
Continue reading →I think that “Being Dialogical” is the inverse of being Emotionally Symbiotic. If we keep an ear out for MasterTalk, and remove it, we can easily and durably stay in a Dialogical space.
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This is a paper about the problem of "victimicity." It is Part 2 of my work on Master/Slave and Autonomy. You may want to read it with some caution, particularly because, based on feedback, this seems to be almost "graduate level" relationship material. It seems you really must be prepared to read it. Please be patient with me, and with yourselves. More material was added 7/5/07. I am sure there will still be minor changes and additions – and one last bit.
I have been using the terms “Master” and “Slave” for quite some time and have not ever found any terms that are more useful in dealing with the problems of Autonomy. However, over the years my usage has stirred up some controversy and even distress in people. At this point I have no plans to change my terms. At the same time I thought I would share a bit about the wonderful controversies.
Continue reading →A conversation with a relationship therapist about avoiding becoming a Bully.
Continue reading →Here is the Master/Slave Lecture AudioFile. FREE DOWNLOAD The Master/Slave chart is here. The Master/Slave Essay is here.
Continue reading →I was amused to find that Einstein wrote about the same struggles I see in couples – who's point of view is the right one. Often a couple will say "we are arguing over the silliest of things." I usually reply, "I don't think so. I think you are struggling over something very important – who is boss. And this decision can seem like life and death." Here is more about this topic.
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